Jonathan Levy LCSW on infidelity
Updated: May 22, 2019
If your partner has cheated on you, you’re probably feeling betrayed, hurt, and confused. You may not know what to do, what steps to take to work to save your marriage, or if your marriage is even worth saving. Prior to experiencing infidelity, most people insist, “If I were cheated on, I would never go back to my partner!” As an experienced Chicago therapist, counselor, and life coach who has worked a lot with couples, the majority of clients cannot hold to that line that they drew in the sand. Deciding to leave a marriage is an enormous decision, even in the face of betrayal.
Fortunately, there are numerous, successful ways of dealing with infidelity – whether you ultimately stay together or not. There is no one-size-fits all solution however. The important thing is for you to engage in self-care, which in many cases means therapy. Therapy can help you sort through your feelings and explore what it is you really want in a safe, supportive environment. Therapy can help you work on your feelings of loss, abandonment, and betrayal.
If you do decide the relationship is worth it and want to work on it, couples therapy is absolutely crucial. Frequently, there needs to be a lot of work focused on re-establishing trust and working through the hurt feelings. As the couple begins to feel more secure again, additional attention can be spent looking at the state of your partnership and creating a plan on moving forward. Experienced therapists who specialize in couples therapy are trained to ask questions about what you both really want from the relationship so that you and your significant other can synchronize your needs. This will then allow you and your significant other to focus on exactly what you want from the relationship.
Relationships can sometimes continue happily after infidelity. Some couples even report that their relationships after infidelity are stronger, healthier, and more resilient. There’s a lot of hard work to do after infidelity, but it is possible to achieve forgiveness and move forward.
If you are blindsided by infidelity in your relationship, please reach out to an experienced therapist like Jonathan Levy LCSW. Whether you choose to explore therapy alone, with your partner, or both, an experienced therapist like myself can help you and any half-decent therapist should not judge. Jonathan Levy LCSW provides tips to pick the perfect therapist and also how to find potential therapists.